Como agradeceré
Todas las cosas
Que has hecho por mí
Cosas inmerecidas
Que diste para mostrar Tu amor por mí
Las voce de un millon de ángeles
No expresáran mi gratitud
Lo que soy y lo que anhelo ser
Lo debo todo a Ti
A Dios sea la gloria
A Dios sea la gloria
A Dios sea la gloria
Por lo que hizo por mí
Con Su sangre me ha limpiado
Su poder me ha salvado
A Dios sea la gloria
Por lo que hizo por mí
Quiero vivir Señor
Rendida siempre sólo a Ti
Pongo a tus pies
Lo que soy
Porque diste todo Señor por mí
Con Su sangre me ha limpiado
Su poder me ha salvado
A Dios sea la gloria
Por lo que hizo por mí
Sea la gloria y la honra
Y el poder por siempre.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
This was the moment.
Lying on my bed looking at my growing picture wall, I saw a picture that has always been one close to my heart. This sweet little girl was an orphan at Sonia's orphanage in La Romana, Dominican Republic. It was my first trip to the DR, and the last time, to this day, that I've seen her.
She changed my life in more ways than she will ever understand. She told me a little of her story, I didn't speak much Spanish at the time but I tried. She told me she didn't have friends and she didn't want to make friends because "people leave." She was very standoffish and skeptical of everything and everyone. Instead of running up to the door when the american group came, she stayed back, watching, but always distant. For that very reason, she caught my attention and I approached her. After a little time of convincing with some with ice cream, she started opening up to me.
This moment is burned into my memory forever - the second day. She wasn't feeling well, so she clung to me and fell asleep in my arms. Towards the end of the afternoon, Cory told us we needed to get ready to go, pack up what we were doing and head out. My heart broke. I sat there crying, praying, and crying more but trying not to wake her up. But to my surprise when I looked down, I saw tears on her little face as well. She knew exactly what was going on, what that meant. I will never forget that moment. I didn't want to be another person that leaves. I didn't want to be another person that isn't in her life. And that was the first clear moment I knew I wanted to pursue missions as more than just a week in the summer time. But for life.
To this day, putting her down and walking away was one of the hardest things I've ever done. That image of her standing behind me, hands on her face, just crying, I will never forget.
"This is why." I heard a little voice yell. "This is why. People LEAVE."
My heart shattered. I promised her I would come back, that I loved her and I would see her again whether on this side of heaven or not.
There is no other place I'd rather be. There is no other work I'd rather do. When I'm there, I don't want to leave. When I'm here, I just want to go back. I want to be someone that's in their lives when they need it, during those hard times and those hurts when they have no one. Help point them back to the only Faithful friend there is, the one that will never leave or hurt them. Because I, on the other hand, am a sinner, a very talented sinner. I am so far from perfect. But my imperfections exalt and magnify the grace that I've received so undeservingly. My heart wants be a blessing to them, an encouragement and to just love them as the Lord has loved me.
Homesick, Lord.
"And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.'And he who was seated on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new." Also he said, "Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true." And he said to me, 'It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment.'" (Revelation 21:3-6 ESV)
She changed my life in more ways than she will ever understand. She told me a little of her story, I didn't speak much Spanish at the time but I tried. She told me she didn't have friends and she didn't want to make friends because "people leave." She was very standoffish and skeptical of everything and everyone. Instead of running up to the door when the american group came, she stayed back, watching, but always distant. For that very reason, she caught my attention and I approached her. After a little time of convincing with some with ice cream, she started opening up to me.
This moment is burned into my memory forever - the second day. She wasn't feeling well, so she clung to me and fell asleep in my arms. Towards the end of the afternoon, Cory told us we needed to get ready to go, pack up what we were doing and head out. My heart broke. I sat there crying, praying, and crying more but trying not to wake her up. But to my surprise when I looked down, I saw tears on her little face as well. She knew exactly what was going on, what that meant. I will never forget that moment. I didn't want to be another person that leaves. I didn't want to be another person that isn't in her life. And that was the first clear moment I knew I wanted to pursue missions as more than just a week in the summer time. But for life.
To this day, putting her down and walking away was one of the hardest things I've ever done. That image of her standing behind me, hands on her face, just crying, I will never forget.
"This is why." I heard a little voice yell. "This is why. People LEAVE."
My heart shattered. I promised her I would come back, that I loved her and I would see her again whether on this side of heaven or not.
There is no other place I'd rather be. There is no other work I'd rather do. When I'm there, I don't want to leave. When I'm here, I just want to go back. I want to be someone that's in their lives when they need it, during those hard times and those hurts when they have no one. Help point them back to the only Faithful friend there is, the one that will never leave or hurt them. Because I, on the other hand, am a sinner, a very talented sinner. I am so far from perfect. But my imperfections exalt and magnify the grace that I've received so undeservingly. My heart wants be a blessing to them, an encouragement and to just love them as the Lord has loved me.
Homesick, Lord.
"And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.'And he who was seated on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new." Also he said, "Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true." And he said to me, 'It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment.'" (Revelation 21:3-6 ESV)
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
God is huge.
He has a huge plan.
I had to leave the DR a little earlier than expected - it was really really hard to leave the work I want to do for the rest of my life, the people I love, and go back into a place (northern va) that is toxic for me. I have every bad influence ready and waiting for me.
But, I prayed and prayed and said lord I know you have a plan, I trust you. Everything has a purpose, I trust you. If I had not come home early, I would have never been able to share the gospel with a good friend of mine, a friend I used to go clubbing with all the time. If I didn't come home early I would have never met up with an old friend who I haven't seen in years and start a bible study, encourage her in the lord. If I had not come home, I would have never been able to work with casa juvenil, which was the most impacting week of my life. I would have never met those people. And I have never felt more at home in a ministry, so right. If I had not come home early, I would have never gotten to share the gospel with a crying girl in NYC at 2:30 am. If I had not come home, I would have never been able to help my family, or my sister in things going on in her life.
God is GOOD. God is MOVING. I'm so grateful.
He has a huge plan.
I had to leave the DR a little earlier than expected - it was really really hard to leave the work I want to do for the rest of my life, the people I love, and go back into a place (northern va) that is toxic for me. I have every bad influence ready and waiting for me.
But, I prayed and prayed and said lord I know you have a plan, I trust you. Everything has a purpose, I trust you. If I had not come home early, I would have never been able to share the gospel with a good friend of mine, a friend I used to go clubbing with all the time. If I didn't come home early I would have never met up with an old friend who I haven't seen in years and start a bible study, encourage her in the lord. If I had not come home, I would have never been able to work with casa juvenil, which was the most impacting week of my life. I would have never met those people. And I have never felt more at home in a ministry, so right. If I had not come home early, I would have never gotten to share the gospel with a crying girl in NYC at 2:30 am. If I had not come home, I would have never been able to help my family, or my sister in things going on in her life.
God is GOOD. God is MOVING. I'm so grateful.
Friday, July 27, 2012
Train station
I'm currently at a train station in new York waiting for my train. Well let's tell a little story.. I was supposed to be in a hotel in NYC tonight but decided to take a train early at 3am so I didn't have to pay for the hotel. So God had a great purpose in me waiting at the train station tonight.
So I was sitting with Caesar (husband of one of the Dominican women I've been working with this last week) I saw this beautiful girl come in crying her eyes out. So of course, I asked Caesar to give me a minute and I felt like I needed to talk to her.
So I went over, asked her if she was okay and she said yes - so I asked her if I could pray for her - wouldn't hurt anyone and I would really like to. So we prayed, she was crying, clearly really upset. We were Talking about how much the Lord loves her, how much He could use this to better her, that He never said it was easy but that He would walk with us and love us fearlessly along the way. That's where the peace is, and it's a joy like none other.
So after, I really didn't want to pry into her life and ask all these questions - none my business. But I just wanted to make sure she felt cared for and safe, like the Lord cares for her and wants to keep her safe. So after talking to her for a little bit, I got to share a little bit about my last few years. About how I was doing everything the World says is great and fun and was SO unhappy and empty. But that the Lord came into my life in a way so real to me, and showed me how much He loves me personally. That it used to be works, rules to me. But That he used everything in my last for where I'm supposed to be now. Well we talked, and she completely understood. She kept thanking me saying I was such a good person and I assured her (what I felt like 10 times because I know I'm not haha) that there's NOTHING good in me. The reasons I'm writing this is because I don't want to forget this conversation so I can pray for her too.
But she had to go, she has my number and name - God is GOOD! if I was in the hotel like I was supposed to be, I would have never gotten to talk to her and share how much the Lord adores her. Pray for her?
So I was sitting with Caesar (husband of one of the Dominican women I've been working with this last week) I saw this beautiful girl come in crying her eyes out. So of course, I asked Caesar to give me a minute and I felt like I needed to talk to her.
So I went over, asked her if she was okay and she said yes - so I asked her if I could pray for her - wouldn't hurt anyone and I would really like to. So we prayed, she was crying, clearly really upset. We were Talking about how much the Lord loves her, how much He could use this to better her, that He never said it was easy but that He would walk with us and love us fearlessly along the way. That's where the peace is, and it's a joy like none other.
So after, I really didn't want to pry into her life and ask all these questions - none my business. But I just wanted to make sure she felt cared for and safe, like the Lord cares for her and wants to keep her safe. So after talking to her for a little bit, I got to share a little bit about my last few years. About how I was doing everything the World says is great and fun and was SO unhappy and empty. But that the Lord came into my life in a way so real to me, and showed me how much He loves me personally. That it used to be works, rules to me. But That he used everything in my last for where I'm supposed to be now. Well we talked, and she completely understood. She kept thanking me saying I was such a good person and I assured her (what I felt like 10 times because I know I'm not haha) that there's NOTHING good in me. The reasons I'm writing this is because I don't want to forget this conversation so I can pray for her too.
But she had to go, she has my number and name - God is GOOD! if I was in the hotel like I was supposed to be, I would have never gotten to talk to her and share how much the Lord adores her. Pray for her?
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
The little girls in the house where I'm staying are the sweetest blessings.
I went down stairs, and they had folded all my clothes and made my bed. It just made my night.
The little girl marinel talked to Jonathan and Gerald (president and vice president of casa juvenil) and basically told him "did you know carolina is coming to santo domingo to work with casa juvenil!" hahah. Apparently I'm going! I was sharing my heart with Jonathan and were all praying that If the lord opens the door, well I'll be on the next plane. The Dominican republic is my home. God is good.
I went down stairs, and they had folded all my clothes and made my bed. It just made my night.
The little girl marinel talked to Jonathan and Gerald (president and vice president of casa juvenil) and basically told him "did you know carolina is coming to santo domingo to work with casa juvenil!" hahah. Apparently I'm going! I was sharing my heart with Jonathan and were all praying that If the lord opens the door, well I'll be on the next plane. The Dominican republic is my home. God is good.
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